Air travel can reduce us all to the lowest common denominator. I mean, where else are we held in a small confined place, behind armed guards at the mercy of major multinational corporations? It’s quite gross when you really think about it like that.

Sitting in an airport, sharing the experience with thousands of other people can really bring out the worst. Slimy washrooms, shitty food, long line-ups and the reality that you have zero control over how this experience is about to go down can be a real trial of patience.

I’m sitting at the gate watching the various people carry their literal and metaphoric baggage around with them. From the guy sleeping in the middle of the floor, blocking an entire bank of seats. The woman applying a full face of make-up. The kids crying. The cheapskate who is bound and determined to avoid bag check fees and has wandered to the gate with a roller bag, a duffle, a garment bag and a back pack. Or how about the girl with the blanket and full size pillow?

Ahh the charm and glamour of it all. No, it’s all about bad coffee, farts and pissy people everywhere. People say enjoy the journey. I’ll just wait til I get there if that’s ok with you.