Psst, hey. Heeeeyyy, can I tell you a secret? When I go on holidays I like to cheat. Do you? I bet you do. And I bet you LOVE it too. Sure, you feel shame afterwards and manage to return home with a great deal of self-loathing, squashing the desire to do it again. Do you save it only for when you are away?
I tried to stop it once. I planned and planned for it. I was successful for one whole trip. But then the next time I left town it happened again, and I realized I was an addict.
To chocolate. To chips. To ice cream. To cheese. To (duh duh duh) GLUTEN.
Oh, is that not what you were thinking? I know you do it too though.
This is how it starts…
Day #1 – After Dinner. Ok, I’m on vacation and I deserve a treat. I can have an ice cream cone with the kids. I mean, its only right. This way I’ll be part of the fun, the memories we’re building with the kids. Sure, its just a little Salted Caramel ice cream in a waffle cone. Its fine. We walked to the ice cream shop, so its like it practically never happened.
Day #2 – Lunch. I can totally have a coke with my lunch. Its ok I’m on holiday and it will just be this once.
Day #2 – Snack. These chips look so good. I’ll just have one. Oooooh but they are so good, just a few more. Well, the kids shouldn’t eat the WHOLE bag themselves. I should help them.
Day #2 – After Dinner. I know I had 3 glasses of wine with dinner, so I shouldn’t have dessert. The wine is my dessert. But its creme brulee. And that’s gluten free so I am practically staying on plan with that (even though it is entirely comprised of dairy AND sugar).
By now, what can you do? You are in!
Day #3 – After Dinner. Oh, are we walking to the ice cream shop again?
Day #4 – Lunch. If I say no bun and order a turkey burger, that’s ok right? Then I can totally ALLOW myself 1 (or 5) of those amazing onion rings.
Day #5 – Breakfast. TODAY I am getting back on my plan. The egg scramble with roasted veggies is super on plan. The spinach and coconut water smoothie was exactly what I needed.
Day #5 – After Dinner. What? Did we just pass the ice cream place? Oh did you guys want to stop there again? Alright. Ok. I had that spinach smoothie today, so I deserve it.
And so on and so on.
Now we’re home and I’m in detox. Except for the leftover bag of chips from the car ride. I mean it would be a waste to NOT finish them, right? Owwww, my tummy hurts…