Dreaming of a Sleepy Christmas

Sleep regression. Why? It’s really kinda cruel and unusual punishment. Kid hits the 2 year mark and has been sleeping through the night for months and you’re finally starting to think and act like a normal human who gets a solid nights sleep. Then WHAM! (Not the George Michael version) sleep regression hits you smack in the face.

Shorty #2 is 2 1/2. She’s all about sleep regression. Bed time can be a nightmare. Not only do we have to lay with her for the 30-60 minutes it takes for her to fall asleep, we have to be prepared for every single delay tactic she hurls at us.

“I’m not tired.”

“Wanna watch a movie.”

“My tummy hurts.”

And the all time favorite;


#2 has perfected the “water ask” better than any kid I’ve ever met. She croaks it out in a weakened whisper, like Lawrence of Arabia stranded in the desert, she spies the oasis in the distance and begins her plea. “Water” she breathes, when we don’t immediately respond, she becomes a little more insistent “waaater”. If we’re not returning with the glass in hand at this point, she becomes a little more unglued until finally;


When finally sufficiently watered and AT LAST asleep, usually after us, we’re now able to settle in for a solid 2-3 hours before the next wake up. This can happen any time between midnight and 4am. And it totally SUCKS. No matter what wakes the little bean, she’s up for minimum another 30-60 minutes. Tossing, turning, kicking, elbowing. Finally she remembers her favorite tool, “WATER” she whispers.

Eventually she’ll doze off again, and I’m up. iPhone blazing, email checking, Facebook nosing – I can’t decide if technology helps or hinders insomnia. If I’m lucky, I’ll catch another hour before the house wakes up to start the day.

And here we are again, back to that sleep deprived state of early motherhood. Living for caffeine and relying on that 3rd cup of coffee. I’m sure the light is at the end of the tunnel, lets hope it’s a nightlight.

…and to all a good and sleepy night.


Dear Shorty #2



Dear #2:

Its amazing to me how big you are getting.  You seem to be growing up so quickly.  While we’re on the subject of maturing, could you do me a favor and speed through this thing called sleep regression?  I’m a little wiped out already, but the 2am – 3am wake-up every night is getting a little old and frankly its not doing either of us any favors.  Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the middle of the night cuddles.  Its the early morning toes digging in my back and elbows in my face that I can do without.

Could you work on the whole “sleeping through the night thing” again so we both can make it through the day?  You see, you’re the lucky one.  You can shut it down for naptime by 11:30am, but I on the other hand am a little busy working for a living to keep a roof over our heads and its somewhat frowned upon in our office for employees to pass out at their desks.

Soooo, if you could work on this for me I’d really appreciate it.  If you can swing it, we’ll be sure to take this into consideration in about 13 years when you’re looking for a later curfew, a raise in your allowance or some new fangled personal electronic device that hasn’t been invented yet.

Thanks in advance for your assistance with this matter.



Sleepless Nights

Check out this great book - The Guide to Baby Sleep Positions

Check out this great book – The Guide to Baby Sleep Positions

Just before Shorty #2 arrived, we decided to buy a king size bed.  Turns out this was a very good call.  You see, our kids are like pack wolves.  They love to sleep all snuggled up with us.

When #2 was born, we didn’t even bother with the crib.  She nursed so often, we just kept her in the bed with us (in a co-sleeper – don’t worry!).  Eventually she moved into her own crib and now sleeps in a toddler bed.  But she falls asleep with us and most mornings wakes up with the sun (thank you very much 49th parallel in the summer when the sun rises at 4:30am!!!) and climbs back into our bed.

The challenge is that Shorty #1 is now 6 (and the height of at least an 8 year old) and she often climbs in with us when she has a nightmare or just wakes up in the middle of the night.  Sometimes, we end up 4 across in the king bed with elbows and butts pushing J and I to the outer banks.

I know I should relish this quality, snuggly time with the kids while they kick and wriggle and stick toes in the waist band of my pj’s.  But man, I’m almost as sleep deprived as when they were babies.

Shorty #2 is a hair twirler (like me), but since her locks are only just coming in she would much prefer to twirl (or better yet clench) my hair.  She can’t go to sleep without a good mass of hair to twirl.  Shorty #1 is becoming more independent, but at bedtime her jealousy of #2 shines through and she fights for position next to me.  So this means I get to be in the middle with a kid on either side; twirling, snuggling, clinging, scratching, elbowing etc…  Forget about having to pee, I am stuck there until everyone falls asleep and we can move them to their own beds.

Hands down, my favorite bed-sharing move is the spin.  That’s when the kid’s head moves off the pillow and nestles into J’s back.  Her feet push into my back (usually her little toes hook into the pj’s waistband) creating the letter “H”.  Sometimes you get lucky and get the head in your back – but don’t be fooled it can be as painful getting a melon in the spine.

I know, I know.  I really need to enjoy these moments because in the not so distance future they won’t want to be anywhere near us.  The real kicker is that when I’m on the road in a hotel room all by myself, I can’t sleep.  I need these little monkeys around me.  So I’ll keep drinking lots of coffee in the mornings, use plenty of under-eye concealer and enjoy the moment.